Saturday, September 16, 2017

The day that I can't control my emotion...

Three years of my studies life I can't really recall how many times I cried but I do remember the number I cried in front of others will be not more than 3 times since I enter University. However, I break my record today because of someone. Don't misunderstand the person is not my another half. (I am still single.. xD... lol). She is my housemates.

Let me introduce my dearest housemate. (=.=) She is someone I know during university orientation week and become my housemate due to some coincidence and both of us sort of in a click till now. We not from the same course but we are from the same faculty. She is a friend who scolds me more than my mother and someone who "bully" me most of the time. She has her own method of handling problems and she always sticks to the rules while doing stuff. Thus, sometimes we will have some conflicts while doing things. Anyhow, mostly I will tolerate because I always feel friend are more important than my own opinion. As long as it doesn't surpass my limit I always okay with it.

In her point of view, I am someone who dares not to speak out my opinion and she tried to train me to become someone better. (I think xD) However, those "training" not really works on me because I wanna treat my friend with the best part of me. Thus, you always feel that I like to keep remain the same things that annoy you even the "advice" keep repeat. The encouragement towards my studies never stop. I still remember during your internship at hometown you will keep reminding me to study and do revisions. (maybe you too free? xD) Seriously, I appreciate it. 

While we repeating the daily routine, times flies 3 years passed. Her effort pays off she manages to complete her studies earlier. Thus, this semester is her last semester in UTAR. I knew that she is going to leave but I never expect that my tears will roll down my cheeks without control once she leaves my eyesight. I tried to cool myself down but failed. Even when my crying mood is off when there is something reminds me of her my tears will drop again. This makes my eyes pain whole day.(T.T) (seems that I just broke up. lol) 

My dearest housemate, 
I knew you might never see this cause you didn't know the address of my blog. There are many things that I wanted to tell you but I feel too cheezy to do so plus I can't really look at you back then cause I was trying to control my tears. Anyways, I want to tell you that congrats on completing all your papers and thanks for what you did to me in this 3 years life. Get to know you are the best thing in UTAR. Those memories will be the most precious moment in my life. Please remember that, you are not just a normal friends to me but a family. There is 4478.5 km from our hometown and I get to know you. Distance never stop us from knoing each other I guess. (xD) No worries I will never give up on my studies or give up on my life. I will be just fine. :)

Please take care of yourself and keep in touch.  All The Best in future and I will see you during your convocation on March. 



Saturday, August 19, 2017

MyY3S2.. Can I still survive?

Oh well... As I said, Life is hard. Everything goes well as I predicted... I failed two subjects for my previous semester. As usual, I have been"tongue-lash" by some people. Which caused me nearly have to quit my studies.

As a human being for 23 years, I had gone through many unhappy and stressed moment. This is the first time I wanna end my life so badly. I just don't understand why I always have conflicts with my parents? When will a proper time for me to become someone who can fully control my own life?

Life sucks... ~.~

Monday, March 6, 2017

Year 3? Life is hard.

Middle of the semester. There is always something happen when the moment I feel home is what I need... It is really hard for me to become someone who needs care from parents? I guess so... Is been a long time didn't have this feeling maybe previously there is many people accompany me all the time but now is getting less and lesser...

A family that just know argue with you when facing financial problem... Friends that keep leaving one by one... Which is worse? I got no idea... I feel proud that I can face so many obstacles along the journey... But today, I am tired... I feel so exhausted with current life. I feel like crying all the time but none of my tears is dropping... Tears is precious because the moment cry can relieve you but "you can't"...

Finally, I understand why people have no courage to move on... To say is always easy, to work on it is not...

Sunday, January 22, 2017

Y3S1 Begins

Seems that I will only update my blog few times a year. Where I summaries my life in few months to make me aware of thing that I have done in these pass few months. Well last semester my results finally got some improvement xD. I not going to say is excellent results but it is the best results I scored in UTAR so far. That moment, no one can understand how happy I was.

Anyways when come to this period there is also some who get bad results. Yup, my partner in crime failed one sub which makes him under termination this semester. I don't know how to comfort him because he gave me a glace to leave him alone. Since year one of my uni life we have been stick together which makes us understand each other very well and of course most of them thought that we are couple which actually not. =.=" .To me he is the type of people which lack of responsibility, ego and coward but somehow he is a nice friend who accompany me to do something crazy. Maybe we have quite similar family background so sometimes I treat him as my brother. Really hope that we can graduate together. I can't really accept my friends leaving UTAR one by one.

New semester coming, new challenge is also here.
It's too late to say GIVE UP!! So? Charge!!!